Thursday, July 16, 2009

The Types of Rob Fans

I apologize for the lack of updates on me but I just had to post this :)

The awesome user yellowgumdrop over at the IMDB boards came up with this fun list which is too awesome and too funny to not share.It’s a list of different Robert Pattinson fans. Which one are you?
- The “Minions”
They put Rob on some pedestal and act like he’s the best at everything in the entire world. All his films deserve to be award winners, he should get more awards, and basically every person needs to bow down to this awesomeness. Anyone that says anything bad about Rob should go to hell. They’re known for their extreme voting abilities, negative thread deletions, and Lainey Gossip write-ins.
- The “Wannabe”
They try to emulate Rob by listening to the same bands he likes, reading the books he reads, and wearing the same clothes as him. They were once very preppy… now they’ve become a hipster. They also deny that Twilight exposed them to Rob because it’s not a cool book or movie… even if they liked it.
- The “Follower”
They show up to as many Rob/Twilight events as possible to feel closer to him, but if they can’t do that, they’ll go after the events of his friends and fellow cast-mates. All they care about is being surrounded by the Rob inner circle.
-The “I’m Not A Stalker”
They believe that if you’ve spent a whole hour/day trying to figure out the places Rob could be at so you could “randomly” bump into him and get an autograph… it’s not stalking. This includes all those fans that went to Vancouver with Twilight book in bag, and waited outside the set/hotel/restaurant for hours and hours, and went bar hoping each night.
- The “Empathizer”
They believe they know Rob’s emotional state, to the point that they know what makes him happy, sad, angry, embarrassed, upset, etc. They try to do/stop things that could incite any of these emotions on Rob. All they care for is Rob’s physical and emotional health… pretending to be more like a mother. Rob is fragile in their eyes.
- The “Nympho”
They only think of one thing: Sex with Rob. Probably doing things to themselves while thinking of him. His fingers, hair, legs, crooked nose, eyes, dandruff, elbows… all of those things turn them on. They have dirty minds and can’t help themselves.
- The “Purists”
They believe Rob is a good person. He only smokes because someone got him addicted, and he’s trying to stop. He doesn’t do drugs or drink. He is a virgin. Of course Little Ashes is a movie not to be talked about or seen… Rob just needed money.
- The “Edwardians”
They believe Rob is Edward and he belongs with Kristen, his Bella. It is hard for them to see Rob the individual. They continuously confuse his behavior for the characters, thinking he can bite them and turn them into a vampire.
- The “Entitled”
They are quick to mention that they liked Rob way before anyone else, and hate the idea that he has so many more fans now. Rob was theirs first and anyone else that comes along doesn’t really know the real Rob and just likes him because they saw him in Twilight… and that’s a bad thing to them.
- The “Shippers”
They think the names Kristen, Nikki, Camilla, Miquita, Nina Ex, are all bad names associated with Rob. All they worry about are his relationships with females. To the point where they can’t stop talking about it or finding evidence of romanticism. They are sometimes similar to the Empathizer fans because these female friends could be harmful. The names Tom, Sam, Bobby, and Marcus are all good names and can do no harm to Rob…even if one might have supplied him with drugs.
- The “Newbies”
They are beginning to understand why Rob has such a large fan base. Most don’t know who Nina is, what How To Be is, or what Robsten is. They also get scared when they encounter one of the other types of Rob fans.
- The “Closeted”
They don’t mention their love of Rob and hide it from their husbands, boyfriends, friends, family, etc. They act as if they don’t know who Rob is, even if someone mentions how hot he is. These closet fans also lurk on boards.
So… which one are you? :)

-Arikka

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